Back to Back Calls to Talk About Nothing☎️🙅♂️
Good afternoon, readers!👋
How are you doing today?
A slightly extended reflection on the absurdity of professional life...🤯
There exists a uniquely curated type of corporate chaos characterised by back-to-back calls that serve absolutely no purpose!
Not for brainstorming. Not for making decisions. Not even for the illusion of productivity.
Just… conversing. Simply existing. Resonating in the realm of Zoom.🧘♂️💻
It always begins innocently enough. A calendar invitation pops up.
Subject: Quick sync
Duration: 30 minutes (lol)
Agenda: —
At this moment, you already sense it. You can feel it deep within.
This call will achieve nothing, clarify nothing, and yet will somehow demand your complete focus.☎️😑
☎️ Call #1:
“Hey everyone!”
“Heyyyy.”
“Can you hear me?”
“Yes.”
“Awesome.”
(Three participants nod. One individual is frozen. Another is muted yet speaking passionately.)
Then comes the infamous phrase:
“So yeah… I just wanted to touch base.”
Touch base about what, exactly?!
The project? The atmosphere? The team’s spiritual alignment?
Because no documents are shared, no metrics are discussed, and no decisions are reached.🚫🧠
☎️ Call #2 (right after):
Same coffee. Same chair. Same look of mild despair.
Different meeting, same result.
Somehow, by the conclusion of the second call, you find yourself mentally drained yet professionally unfulfilled.
Your to-do list remains untouched, but your calendar feels remarkably productive.📅✨
Now, let’s dive into the multitasking theatre.🎭
You’re half-listening (sort of), nodding (a lot), while secretly:
- responding to emails
- searching for "how to escape endless meetings"
- wondering if anyone would even notice if you quietly slipped away from the call
Then, just when you think it’s finally over, someone chimes in:
"Before we conclude..."
There was no conclusion. There was no start.
The call wraps up with vague optimism:
"Let’s connect offline."
"Let’s revisit this later."
"Let’s keep this dialogue open."
No actions. No accountability. No follow-up.
Just good vibes and another meeting invite for next week.🙃📆
The real trick is how these calls pile up. One after another. No time to breathe. No chance for a bio break.
Just an endless stream of professional chit-chat, like speed dating but with even less chemistry and worse lighting.🎥💀
So here’s a humble suggestion:💡
If a call lacks a purpose, an outcome, and a justification for being... Let it fade away.
Send a message. Share a document. Record a Loom.
Compose one concise sentence that clarifies your request.
The world won’t come crashing down. In fact, productivity might just occur.
Until that time, I’ll remain here.
Camera on. Microphone muted.
Nodding as if my bonus relies on it.☎️🤡
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